How to Hold a Parent

Told from the perspective of the Child, the story follows her at ages 7, 13, 20, and 23. As she grows up and the state of the Parent deteriorates, she slowly begins to make sense of the Parent’s behaviour and limitations. Her attitude evolves from childlike hope to frustration, disappointment, and eventual acceptance, as she comes to grips with the parent’s struggle with alcoholism.

Blending monologue with puppetry, the story explores the effects of growing up with a parent who is physically present but emotionally absent, or very limited at best, leaving the child with the burden of learning to hold both love and grief.

I’ve wanted to explore heavy topics from the innocence of a child for a while now. With addiction being one of the themes I’m often drawn to, the piece naturally took shape as a coming-of-age monologue from the child’s perspective. Grief, and the challenge of moving forward while trying to make peace with the past, felt like a natural continuation of that exploration.

After seeing a puppetry show earlier this year, the format finally came together, with the Parent represented by a puppet. This created a visual way of showing a parent who is physically present but emotionally absent, while giving the puppeteer and director the freedom to allow as much or as little space for the Parent to react.

How do you grow into adulthood when your parent never quite shows up?